I kept seeing 'Husband Hunter' on my timeline but I had no idea what it meant. I later found out it was one of those girls who constantly documented her 'wife credentials' on social media in the hope it will attract the right man. I found it pretty amusing that guys were complaining as these girls always list the things they seem to want. However these 'husband hunters' clearly don't understand relationships. They don't seek balance, they seek a son who they can baby and pamper, rather than trying to know and understand what the guy wants and needs as every man is different.
Relationships are all about balance. Whether it be parent and child, friendship or marriage all these relationships work because there is a balance of give and take. Even if a woman dates a rich older man who pays for everything, very often she will have to look after the home and herself which is what he takes from her. He probably also enjoys her company and seeks nothing more but she is giving of herself in exchange for apart of him so there is a definite balance.
Many girls nowadays expect designer bags on the first date but would never offer to pay for that same date even if they knew he would decline. Doing so shows goodwill and manners but also that there is a balance between the two of you. This being that she can look after herself so you know from the start she will not be dependent on you, you are equal and only an extension of her. You can't be screaming I'm an independent woman but stall when it comes to the bill. The same way so many guys stupidly expect husband privileges without anything to show for himself such as cooked meals and petrol money when they do nothing but provide you with sex. I'm sorry, but if you provide me with nothing but sex then don't expect anything else in return. If the female doesn't drive I'm pretty sure you don't put money on her Oyster card when she comes to meet you, you don't do her food shopping so why is she catering to you in such a manner? If you think that this is how it should be then you might as well change for name to Jody, be a real life baby boy and marry your mother. Your wife is not your care giver or legal guardian, only your children's. She is there to help you better yourself and start a family. She is there to provide a balance. Cooking is not part of a woman's wife credentials'. Sure it makes you more desirable but it is a life skill that is necessary to us all. I can guarantee that there is a girl out there who cannot cook but she is perfect for you because you have similar interests, one of them being you as a person. She takes the time to understand and support you in order to appease you. That's the type of woman you need, but she isn't worthy of a ring because she cannot cook, right??
Side note - For all you females out there who cannot cook saying 'yassssss' no just no. I am not saying you don't need to know how to cook but aim to be more than just a trophy wife. Cooking is essential even if you intend on being forever alone.
Some may say that all I have said displays the attributes of a 'disobedient' woman but as a man you should look to guide not control your wife. She should follow your lead, so if the only lead you provide is sex then expect nothing more than a change of position when she is ready to be in control. I personally enjoy being submissive in relationships, I like my man to show dominance but understand that we are equal. If need be I can take control of finances and whatever else there is. I like to learn from him and vice versa. However, in order for me to submit all the time and feel as if I need to give you more, I need you to give me something to go off. We should keep each other interested and on our toes always. Do you lot really want to come home to the same pot of rice everyday after work, maybe some sex and boring conversation? If you said yes then you really need to find yourself an attractive house girl for a remote village somewhere and put a ring on that. If more of you listened, wanted conversations about meaningful things or just showing support without being prompted, I can guarantee less women would rebel and feel the need to look after their man.
Most recently I saw a lot of boys on my TL retweet a picture of Lala Anthony
who bought her husband, basket ball player Carmelo Anthony, a Corvette sports car. I saw ridiculous comments like 'see you girls demand too much she treats her man right' to be fair it was his birthday what do you expect? Surprisingly, the comments came from some of the most chauvinistic pigs I follow that always talk about a woman's duties within a marriage being to cook and rear children, nothing more. These were followed by endless clapping emoji's from their other male companions. Now, I'm no relationship expert and I don't know Lala but from the caption it's clear that he has provided her with all she has needed from the very start of their 10 year relationship. She followed his lead and provided the same so there is a clear balance. Not like the majority of you guys that chase a girl to get her attention but as soon as she puts in effort you decide to get comfortable, then expect her to chase you so the scales completely tip. But when she explains this she is overreacting *side eye*.
I was with someone for over a year and things just became tedious because the little he gave never matched what I gave. I would like to think I gave him a lot as he never complained, but I think that was my downfall. I gave him too much, both emotionally and financially expecting the exact same in return. In the end it did happen, but a little too late and not how I had expected so I wasn't happy. But because of how much I liked him I convinced myself I was happy. I always mentioned it and it just caused arguments but one day he asked me to break down exactly what I had done for him. I did and his response was 'I don't have to prove what I've done for you but just know I have'. As expected I was so pissed off but communication makes all the difference. Although I was giving him all this information he was in denial and was trying to ignore all I said. One of the reasons we are no longer together. He wanted to be a Jody so I had to let him.
I was with someone for over a year and things just became tedious because the little he gave never matched what I gave. I would like to think I gave him a lot as he never complained, but I think that was my downfall. I gave him too much, both emotionally and financially expecting the exact same in return. In the end it did happen, but a little too late and not how I had expected so I wasn't happy. But because of how much I liked him I convinced myself I was happy. I always mentioned it and it just caused arguments but one day he asked me to break down exactly what I had done for him. I did and his response was 'I don't have to prove what I've done for you but just know I have'. As expected I was so pissed off but communication makes all the difference. Although I was giving him all this information he was in denial and was trying to ignore all I said. One of the reasons we are no longer together. He wanted to be a Jody so I had to let him.
Don't get me wrong, I have seen the ridiculous demands from both men and women but I think women get more stick for it when in actual fact I believe men are the real problem. We are a generation looking to obtain all the things we are not ready to maintain as quickly as possible. The most two most common things being large amounts of money and long term relationships. A woman cannot put herself into you whole heartedly and allow herself to fall madly in love if you want to restrain your feelings for stupid reasons and give her nothing back. There is no balance and therefore no real relationship. Some people like it like that but I can guarantee it won't end well.
